Infamous Methodists

I was baptized and raised in the Methodist church. My father was a Methodist lay minister. My grandfather was the Methodist chaplain at one of the largest hospitals in Missouri.

At one time in my life, I was proud to call myself a Methodist. But the Methodist church began to deteriorate in the seventies after merging with another denomination to become the United Methodist Church. It seemed as if the denomination was becoming more and more liberal (and spineless), both theologically and politically. Eventually, I stopped attending that church except to visit on very rare occasions.

Looking back, I have to say that I'm glad I made that decision, especially when I consider some of the people the Methodist church has contributed to our culture in recent years.

Let's consider a few of the figures who occupy the hall of Methodist infamy:

Sarah Weddington

Thanks to the industrious work of this illustrious attorney from Texas, abortion was legalized in 1973 in the case known as Roe v. Wade. So far, roughly 50 million human beings have been killed legally as the result of her efforts.

Incidentally, the "Roe" in Roe v. Wade, Norma McCorvey, has long since repudiated her own role in the matter. The significance of that fact apparently eludes Weddington, since she has not repented of her own role in that national tragedy.

Hugh Hefner

Yes, the man most responsible for popularizing porn and adultery in America also came from the Methodist church, which he claimed was "repressive".

If the leaders in the Methodist church had done a better job of presenting biblical sexuality in a manner which had helped Hefner to understand the difference between freedom and licentiousness, contemporary American culture might be profoundly different. And a lot of people such as myself might not have come from broken homes.

Hillary Clinton

That's right, Hillary Clinton --- who was recently quoted by the Chicago Free Press as having said that she would be the first president, if elected, to march in a Gay Pride parade --- is also a "lifelong, devout Methodist".

Perhaps President Hillary will appear on the float along with the woman who recently appeared topless (with "pasties") at the Gay Pride parade in Chicago. Gosh, won't that photo op please Bill immensely!

Or maybe Hillary will join arms with the young lady I saw at the Fullerton CTA stop, a few years ago when the parade was being held. The girl had a T-shirt which said "Taste The Rainbow," along with a big arrow pointing straight at her crotch. Yummy! (That's sarcasm, for those of you who are incapable of discerning the obvious.)

Gregory Dell

Dell is a United Methodist minister from Chicago. He achieved his notoriety by performing weddings between gay couples, in spite of the United Methodist policy forbidding such weddings. (Well, at least there are some Methodists who have some moral backbone.)

Walter Coleman

The pastor of the tiny Adalberto United Methodist Church in Chicago's Humboldt Park neighborhood, Walter Coleman's main contribution to culture in this nation of ours has been to undermine the idea that new immigrants to our country have an obligation to obey our immigration laws. His willingness to harbor Elvira Arellano and Flor Crisostomo, both of whom sought "refuge" in Coleman's church, ought to embarrass the United Methodist Church immensely.

George Bush

O.K., the Methodist church isn't completely corrupt yet. George is a flawed man, no doubt about it, but I'm still glad that I voted for him, when I consider who his opponents were at the time.

There are other good (albeit fallible) people in the Methodist church as well.

If you're one of the good Methodists who are trying your hardest to help undo the damage caused by those who have given the United Methodist Church a bad name, then I salute you.

As for me, I no longer identify myself as a Methodist. I no longer identify exclusively with any particular denomination. I just call myself a Christian. I think that's the way Christ would want it.

The Vast Right Wing Conspiracy ... Er, Machine

"For 15 years, I have stood up against the right-wing machine and I’ve come out stronger. So if you want a winner who knows how to take them on, I’m your girl.” So said Hillary Clinton today at an AFL-CIO rally.

Apparently, in the befuddled mind of Hillary Clinton, standing against the "right wing machine" included voting in favor of invading Iraq. Thanks to Senator Barack Obama for pointing that out to those who seemed to be suffering from amnesia.

Clinton's reference to a "right wing machine" evokes memories of an earlier time when she talked about a "vast right wing conspiracy". Both terms suggest that there is unanimity within the Republican party, and that we Republicans are cold, soulless people who care nothing for the needs of others.

Funny, I would have thought that such a characterization would be more appropriate for the party which is most responsible for the needless deaths of tens of millions of unborn children over the past 34 years. That's vastly more people than the number of people who have died in Iraq. Either Democrats can't count, or they prefer to ignore the implications inherent in the fact that many of their own leaders have acknowledged that human life begins at conception. That includes Bill Clinton, Jesse Jackson and John Kerry. You can check it out for yourself if you don't believe me.

I suppose that it's appropriate that Clinton would talk in terms related to machinery when speaking with members of the AFL-CIO, particularly at a gathering in Chicago. The AFL-CIO has long been known for its political "machine" (which is why Clinton so covets the group's endorsement), and the same could be said for the Democratic party in Chicago.

Clinton's use of the term "machine" is only slightly less paranoid than her earlier use of the term "conspiracy". If Republicans have such an efficient and powerful machine, then why is it that we haven't managed to overturn Roe v. Wade, despite more than three decades of trying to do so?

If Hillary Clinton fails to win the nomination or the election, she will undoubtedly blame sexism. But that will be a misplaced attribution. I'd be happy to vote for a female candidate if I could be persuaded that the individual candidate in question was competent, and that that candidate possessed the level of insight and integrity which is needed by a president of the United States. There may well be a woman out there somewhere who fits that description, but Hillary Clinton is not that woman. I think she's an idiot. Nevertheless, I hope that she beats Barack Obama in the primaries, because Obama will probably be harder to beat in the general election.